Pure Joy!

I hope this makes sense. I am rushing through typing this out.

This morning John went into work while I stayed home with the rest of our children as we all needed the time together. I can definitely tell the separation has taken a toll on them. We all miss our normal routine.

John and I went down to Milwaukee in the afternoon with the hope was that I could hold Grace as the nurse last night told me I'd be able to.

We arrived to find that Grace's room was quiet as she was moved to a conventional infant ventilator that is assisting her own breaths rather than doing it for her as the oscillating one was. She is also off of all medication except Fentynal, the sedative, which is set very low.

We were able to see the doctors rounds which is always interesting as they gather to discuss your baby's treatment plan. The first day I was there the discussion was a bit longer but this time it was a few minutes with each of the doctors commenting on how wonderful Grace's progress is. Dr. Khalil came to talk to us later for an update.

He is extremely pleased with how quickly Grace is recovering. He told us when they picked her up from St. Joseph's on Sunday they had envisioned an entirely different scenario with a much more invasive treatment. Thank you Lord for working so mightily in Grace! The thought of what might have been and then to see her now is overwhelming.

Being that we had been waiting for a few hours without any sign of holding Grace we asked how soon I could hold her and he said, "A few more days." My disappointment was great but most important to me was that she get better and so I resigned myself to that.

But, when the night nurse, Amy, came on she had other plans. She asked if I had held Grace and when she found I hadn't she made it her mission to get her in my arms. First thing was securing the ventilator tube better as our little girl had woken up enough to notice the tube and began gagging to the point of throwing up all over. We had a hard time seeing her struggle like that. The respiratory therapist came to assist in that. And then began the process of holding sweet Grace. As they moved the chair around for me tears began to fall with the thought of what was about to happen. It was quite the process as the two of them placed my daughter in my arms for the first time. Pure Joy!

One benefit to all of this is the one on one time John and I are getting as a couple. It is like a constant date and is so good for us.

Looking forward to Friday when Gracie might be extubated! Moving forward.